Today

This is one of my favorite pictures of me and my dad. I've never questioned that he loved me or was proud of me. I'm thankful for this today too. 

Today I'm thankful for: #1- A short week. I love my kids, I really do but I'm so excited to have a few days off. I also loved this whole week because yesterday felt like Thursday but it was only Tuesday and today I had to keep reminding myself that it was Wednesday and not Friday. I love a short week!

#2- A good little run. Kerri got home from work and we decided to go for a little run. I needed it.

#3 - The knowledge that families are forever and good friends. This evening I was talking to Liz and Ruffin said, "Tell her your mom is trying to get a hold of her. She needs to call her." I replied with, "No she's not." My phone hadn't rung. But he insisted so we got off the phone and I called my mom. She calmly informed me that my dad had been killed in a car accident this afternoon. I said, "Who?" and she repeated that it was dad. I'm in a state of shock. Unexpected news that your brain just doesn't know how to process. I looked at Kerri and told her and was so glad she was home tonight. Honestly, what would I have done if I'd been sitting home alone? I just needed someone to be with me and I was so thankful for Kerri and that she's my friend. Soon after I talked with my mom Jonathan called asking me if I was OK. I said I was OK but in shock and not really feeling like it was real. We didn't stay on the phone long because we were just sitting in silence. I texted Nikkie, Raegan, and Tricia to let them know. Nikkie soon called and then Raegan and then I talked to Tricia later. I'm so blessed with wonderful friends who I know in the weeks and months ahead will give me the support I will need. I just mostly sat on the couch and tried not to think too much about anything. I talked to my mom again and told her I'd be coming home tomorrow and that I wanted to make sure she wasn't alone. Then Jonathan called me back and we talked a bit more. Then later my sweet grandpa called to tell me how much he loved me. And that he'd be around by Friday afternoon - he's in meetings in Sun Valley- but he wanted me to know that if I thought Grandpa was needed then he'd be home sooner. I love this sweet man. He then said these things are never easy but they're a part of life. That doesn't make it easier but they are. He told me about the day his dad passed away that he'd had a stroke that would have left him a vegetable. He said the doctor was so puzzled because the type of stroke he had usually didn't kill people. Grandpa then said he told the doctor that the night before he'd given his dad a blessing and that there was no blessing to give. He and grandma and Uncle Ed and Aunt Carol had gone home and pleaded with the Lord that if it was his time to go that his dad would go peacefully. He'd had a stoke the next day and passed away. Grandpa told me that he loved me and then said goodbye.

I don't know why things happen the way they do. But I do know that families are meant to be together forever. This life is not the end. That I'll see my sweet father again. He is with his mother, his grandfather who he often talked of with fondness and with my mom's mom who loved him like she loved all her kids. I don't question where he is or if my relationship with him will once again grow when this life is over for me. I'm not even questioning why. What I do have to face is missing him, knowing that when I get married he won't be there to share the day with me, that my mom will feel alone, and he won't get the chance to see his grandkids grow up. But it's OK. It's OK because of the gospel of Jesus Christ. Because Christ was resurrected we will all be resurrected and I will see my dad again. Because my parents were sealed together in a holy temple I am sealed to him and I will always be his. Today this is what I am thankful for. And I'm guessing I'll be thankful for this even more than I've ever been every day for the rest of my life.

Here's my actual picture from the day. I made Kerri take it with me right before we finally went to bed. She'll never know how grateful I am she was home this night. I'm so thankful for wonderful friends.